Ask me and I'll deny it. I did not go against the advice of the vacation fairy. I did not sneak into work at 2am, in order to go through my e-mails.

Yeah, but I did. I did go to work. I did spend the morning sorting through my e-mails. I had to do it, otherwise Monday would be a nightmare. I tried to do it from home, but the damn connection was too slow. It took forever and my notebook kept locking up, so I decided to haul my ass off to work and do it there.

Yes, but why so early in the morning? Well, because I was embarrassed. I mean who else goes to work and works for free, during their vacation?

I had 1521 e-mails in my inbox and about a third of them were marked urgent. It would have been more, if my inbox hadn't exceeded the size limit and triggered the filter. It was tedious work. I made myself a pot of coffee and sorted non-stop until I was through. Then I recorded a bunch of voicemails regarding the status of the outstanding issues, but I didn’t actually send them. Instead I time stamped each voicemail to be delivered Monday morning. That way it wouldn’t look like I came in during the weekend. Pathetic ruse, eh?

I think I’m going to crawl into bed and fall asleep. I’ll write more tomorrow.

Talk show guests for tomorrow, Monday September 27th
Conan O'Brien: Tom Selleck, Macauley Culkin, Dave Attell (R)
Craig Kilborn: Amy Brenneman, Meat Loaf, Tears for Fears, guest host Michael Ian Black
Daily Show: Rosie Perez
David Letterman: Queen Latifah, Jack Hanna
Ellen DeGeneres: Lauren Graham, Peter Boyle, Patti Scialfa
Jay Leno: Garry Shandling, Hilary Duff
Jimmy Kimmel: Dennis Franz, Ali Landry, the Used
Last Call: Don King, Max Kellerman, Angie Stone
Regis and Kelly: Jim Belushi, Dean Cain, yoga demonstration with Baron Baptiste
The View: Tony Danza, Robert Klein